I just had something on my mind and I just said it. And that’s really the foreshadowing of my entire career and my entire life. When I have something to say, I’ll say it.
the other day i was standing at an intersection, waiting to cross the street and a boy stood next to me and sang “i’m a tulip in a cup/i stand no chance of growing up” and then the light changed for his direction, and he crossed, and i sang in my head “i’ve made my peace i’m dead i’m done/i watch you live to have my fun”
when i went to see fiona apple i overheard one of the ushers ask another if he knew who she was and he said “all i know is i heard she’s something like alanis morisette”
one time in a how was your week opening monologue julie klausner said something about parallel parking while listening to fiona apple just like summing up being an adult single woman, and i don’t know why those signifiers work but they do, and often since hearing that podcast i’ve found myself being like “oh just parallel parking while listening to fiona apple again!”
I don’t know what I’m doing, don’t know should I
Change my mind, I can’t decide, there’s too many
Variations to consider
No thing I do don’t do no thing but bring me
More to do,
It’s true, I do imbue my blue unto myself,
I make it bitter
seeing fiona apple made me remember how i bought tidal at the local record store from the used cds bin (also where i bought my first tori amos album). it was high school and i was late to the party (by like 9 years), which i always was with everything - growing up in a small town, without television, bookish and terrified of making mistakes. i listened to tidal driving alone, which was a first thrill of something, not freedom, more like a self-defining. as i stood in the crowd last night, and she played shadowboxer, it was the highway curving ahead of me through irrigated fields of corn and hay, the sun setting, the smell of manure from the feed lots, the brush of my seventeen year old self, so on the verge.
But all the time, all the time
I’ll know, I’ll know